So...hi. I can't sleep. And after all that yelling I did at my neighbor about staying quiet so I can get some rest. Damn.
This week has been awful. Really, truly awful. No good, horrible, terrible, really bad week. Ugh.
First the birthday. Then a fight with Nancy. Then a bad, bad shift I still wish I hadn't taken. Then a drive to Tahlequah to fix my relationship with Nancy, which led to deep, super emotional conversation. While needed and so appreciated, it's very draining stuff. But, we're good, and that's a win, and I'm holding on tight to my wins during this no good, really awful week.
So then I drove home and left Nancy and John to nap--well, first I forgot my wallet in their car and they had to deliver it to me at the gas station so I could, you know, buy gas. And when I got home, I proceeded to antagonize a fight between me and Chetara. Fuck me.
Because, I'm really actually very mad about the birthday thing. Really truly awfully mad. So, we fought. And she is letting me be as mad as I want for as long as it takes. Thank god, because I apparently am not getting over it today.
I didn't burn any bridges, but I felt Ike I was coming pretty close. Luckily, birthday forgetters that they are, they're also pretty amazing friends. (Even though they forgot my birthday. Damn, I can't let it go. Is it petty? This is petty.)
So, I'm exhausted and all I want to do is sleep, but my neighbor has all his friends over and they are once again holding a free-style rap party in the front lawn, right outside my window. I give the bastards until ten, then I put on my big girl pants and go tell them to shut it. And, you know, every one but the actual neighbor and the token black dude--not kidding, there was one, and he kept calling me racist and playing the black card--was totally cool with it. Especially after my neighbor called me a bitch. Then everyone, his girlfriend included, was all uppity about him crossing a line. Do you know how much of a fuck I give that he thinks I am a bitch? Hey, I may be a bitch, but at least I'm courteous to my neighbors, mother fucker. Ugh.
So, they do actually shut up, because the girlfriend said so. And, he can't exactly retaliate, because if anything happens, I know who is behind it and so will the cops. This bitch ain't scared.
Okay, I am a little, because I don't like confrontation. (I know, shocking, but true.) My heart rate was all elevated and I was flushed. So, I hop into bed and wait for the adrenalin to stop pumping and for my head to calm down when I feel it. And then I kick it. And then I jump up out of bed and go for the light, so horrified that I DID NOT just share a bed with a cockroach. Yeah, I did. OH MY GOD.
So, I scrambled looking for my landlord's number, but I couldn't find it in the annoyed frenzy. I decided I will call tomorrow, when he will actually be around to personally ignore my gripe as opposed to just deleting the unheard voice mail. I know others have already complained to no avail. And I know someone moved out of one of the other buildings for the same reason. I'm wondering if I can get away with finding a new place. Can you break a lease because your landlord won't kill the bugs? Or should I just get a roach hotel or something and wait it out until April?
Sigh.
So, I feel like crap. I'm angry and exhausted and can't sleep and I have noisy neighbors and bugs in my bed. I'm unhappy today.
And I wanted to talk to somebody, so I called Boomer. And he actually talked to me on the phone. And he made me feel about fifteen times better. I don't know how he does it, but he always makes me feel just a little bit better. I think I'll keep him around. Thanks, Boom. :)
But, I still can't sleep. Which is why I'm doing this now. Because, I can't sleep even though I am exhausted and I have to work at 06:45 and Boomer made me feel okay again. I still can't sleep, so I'm blogging.
And now I am going to stop blogging so I can lay in bed and not sleep some more. Here's hoping for a good night's rest. Yeah.
I hope everyone else's week is going better than mine. According to Boom, next week will be better. I'm going to chose to believe him, even if he's not a fortune teller.
This week has been awful. Really, truly awful. No good, horrible, terrible, really bad week. Ugh.
First the birthday. Then a fight with Nancy. Then a bad, bad shift I still wish I hadn't taken. Then a drive to Tahlequah to fix my relationship with Nancy, which led to deep, super emotional conversation. While needed and so appreciated, it's very draining stuff. But, we're good, and that's a win, and I'm holding on tight to my wins during this no good, really awful week.
So then I drove home and left Nancy and John to nap--well, first I forgot my wallet in their car and they had to deliver it to me at the gas station so I could, you know, buy gas. And when I got home, I proceeded to antagonize a fight between me and Chetara. Fuck me.
Because, I'm really actually very mad about the birthday thing. Really truly awfully mad. So, we fought. And she is letting me be as mad as I want for as long as it takes. Thank god, because I apparently am not getting over it today.
I didn't burn any bridges, but I felt Ike I was coming pretty close. Luckily, birthday forgetters that they are, they're also pretty amazing friends. (Even though they forgot my birthday. Damn, I can't let it go. Is it petty? This is petty.)
So, I'm exhausted and all I want to do is sleep, but my neighbor has all his friends over and they are once again holding a free-style rap party in the front lawn, right outside my window. I give the bastards until ten, then I put on my big girl pants and go tell them to shut it. And, you know, every one but the actual neighbor and the token black dude--not kidding, there was one, and he kept calling me racist and playing the black card--was totally cool with it. Especially after my neighbor called me a bitch. Then everyone, his girlfriend included, was all uppity about him crossing a line. Do you know how much of a fuck I give that he thinks I am a bitch? Hey, I may be a bitch, but at least I'm courteous to my neighbors, mother fucker. Ugh.
So, they do actually shut up, because the girlfriend said so. And, he can't exactly retaliate, because if anything happens, I know who is behind it and so will the cops. This bitch ain't scared.
Okay, I am a little, because I don't like confrontation. (I know, shocking, but true.) My heart rate was all elevated and I was flushed. So, I hop into bed and wait for the adrenalin to stop pumping and for my head to calm down when I feel it. And then I kick it. And then I jump up out of bed and go for the light, so horrified that I DID NOT just share a bed with a cockroach. Yeah, I did. OH MY GOD.
So, I scrambled looking for my landlord's number, but I couldn't find it in the annoyed frenzy. I decided I will call tomorrow, when he will actually be around to personally ignore my gripe as opposed to just deleting the unheard voice mail. I know others have already complained to no avail. And I know someone moved out of one of the other buildings for the same reason. I'm wondering if I can get away with finding a new place. Can you break a lease because your landlord won't kill the bugs? Or should I just get a roach hotel or something and wait it out until April?
Sigh.
So, I feel like crap. I'm angry and exhausted and can't sleep and I have noisy neighbors and bugs in my bed. I'm unhappy today.
And I wanted to talk to somebody, so I called Boomer. And he actually talked to me on the phone. And he made me feel about fifteen times better. I don't know how he does it, but he always makes me feel just a little bit better. I think I'll keep him around. Thanks, Boom. :)
But, I still can't sleep. Which is why I'm doing this now. Because, I can't sleep even though I am exhausted and I have to work at 06:45 and Boomer made me feel okay again. I still can't sleep, so I'm blogging.
And now I am going to stop blogging so I can lay in bed and not sleep some more. Here's hoping for a good night's rest. Yeah.
I hope everyone else's week is going better than mine. According to Boom, next week will be better. I'm going to chose to believe him, even if he's not a fortune teller.
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