Cutting My Losses

I love my job. But, lately I've been on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

Partners have an unprecedented bond. We're meant to have each other's backs, help each other out, literally hold each other's lives in our hands. What happens when that relationship turns sour?

You would think we would talk it out. Lay out all that's bothering us, accept responsibility for our faults, acknowledge the other's hurt feelings --you know, we're adults. But, if your partner is my partner, talking about annoyances and little irritants would "make waves" in the relationship. So, instead, I find myself the target of explosive episodes of anger. What the hell am I supposed to do about this? Especially when I try to talk, and get shot down immediately.

I am at a loss, and seriously considering speaking to someone about finding a new shift. Finding a new partner. Even someone I couldn't respect would be better than someone I am beginning to resent. But, I don't want to be that weak individual who seeks a different partner because they can't handle where the relationship has gone. You have to ask yourself, are we compromising patient care?

And, if I know one thing, I can't be the girl going home every night crying in anticipation of the misery tomorrow will bring. I refuse.

What do I do?

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I-5

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